Long before I ever had children, I knew that I wanted to be a Mother who had children that displayed strong values & character traits.
Not just kids with good character, but kids who displayed high moral values. Values and beliefs that could change the world – for the better.
Morals, values, characteristics, and a strong set of beliefs (with the ability to adapt and be open to new ideas) is – in a nutshell – what and WILL change the world after all.
And isn’t that the goal of humanity?
To life the best life that we can? To make the most of what we have? To enjoy every second of the ride? To pass on a legacy that is worthy, honest, and helpful to future generations to come?
Maybe it’s just me, but those life goals are what fuels me to become the best person that I can be every day. To seize every opportunity that I am given. NOT let this life that I have been blessed with go to waste.
And passing on good morals and values to my kids is at the top of my life’s checklist and what gives meaning to me being a Mother.
Even when motherhood can feel lonely, crazy, and somewhat chaotic, this is what I always fall back on. I have an opportunity each and every day to make the world a little bit bright by teaching my kids character traits that they can pass on too.
Why should we teach our kids quality character traits?
Because it’s what makes all the difference not in just your life, but in the life of those around you.
Imagine if you didn’t teach your kids any admirable character traits. How do you think they would turn out?
Do you think they will end up with a lot of meaningful friendships? Do you think they will get good jobs based on merit and hard work? Do you think they would automatically one day decide to be a good person?
No, because all quality traits must be taught. And they must witness these traits EVERY SINGLE DAY in order for them to “stick.”
Because this stuff doesn’t come naturally. Maybe to some, but most of the time? Nahhh. I have 4 kids with very distinct personalities to prove me otherwise.
Positive character traits yields a positive life.
I always find myself repeating myself and coming back to the life saying of “what you put in is what you get out” and the same goes for your character.
The way that you treat people, the way that you act, and the way that you think will ultimately determine the quality of life that you have.
In other words, if you lead a positive life, you will yield positive outcomes. Unless you want your kids to have a negative life, full of upset and pain, then taking the reigns on their morality needs to become PRIORITY at an early age.
Teach them before the teenage years.
Now, I personally don’t have a teenager yet, but my eldest is 6 months shy of being one and has matured at a pretty intense rate over the past year. So, I *think* I am qualified to say that this is VERY important.
For one, your teenager will start to become more independent than ever. Talk back to you. Maybe even flat out defy you.
This is why building a strong set of character traits when they are young is so vital.
If they ever display a moment of weakness, then they WILL KNOW IT. Not only will they know and understand what they did wrong, but they will feel urged (on their own) to make up for their mistakes.
Another solid reason to teach this stuff when they are young is because they will start to question you. And if they have a strong sense of who they are (and who YOU are as their parent), then they are less likely to wonder too far off that road.
Sometimes kids just need space to “figure things out”, so it’s important that they have some mental awareness of these things BEFORE they start down that path.
If it were up to me, these would be the top character traits to teach your kids before the teenage years.
*This blog is reader supported. When you buy through links on this site, we MAY earn an affiliate commission at no extra cost to you. We only promote what we love & makes us happy, so our product and service recommendations are 100% honest*
HONESTY
Being honest is being open, trustworthy and truthful. When people are honest, they can be relied on not to lie, cheat, or steal. Honesty is telling the truth.
When others know that you are an honest person – because you have displayed it over and over again – people will likely look up and admire you. You will become a highly esteemed person by those who value honesty and integrity (which is worth it’s weight in gold).
And you know what they all say about honesty? Honest is the BEST policy.
HARD WORK
It’s not always easy teaching kids to work hard. In all honesty (see what I did there???), I have ONE child who is not a hard worker. In fact, he will go out of his way and even waste his precious time making his jobs harder simply by trying to take a shorter path.
In this case, it’s not a cut and dry thing to teach, but leading by example can help drive this home even for the most reluctant worker.
If your kids see that you work hard every single day and don’t try to take shortcuts and the easy way out, then it will eventually rub off on them too.
I am living proof of this. As a kid, I was much like the child I just described above. Lazy, unmotivated, and never strived for anything more than what I needed to do to get the job done. But, my Dad was a prime example of hard work and dedication – and just witnessing him being such a hard worker growing up led to me wanting to be the same way.
Sometimes we best way is to just lead by example and your kids will mirror your actions too.
RESPONSIBILITY
This one is one of those life-long goals. To always take responsibility for our actions and how we act and react to situations.
Even in the toddler years, this can be taught through simple tasks around the house like picking up toys, getting dressed, and eating vegetables.
When your children become older, they will start to take on more responsibilities based on their maturity level and how much they have EARNED. In our house, the more self-responsibility that you show, they more that you earn – which ultimately leads to more “rewards” and freedoms.
I like to teach my kids that when they are more responsible for cleaning up after themselves and owning their mistakes, they create more freedom in their life by not being tied down with extra tasks or the burden of guilt hanging over their shoulder.
And if you want a fun & easy way to introduce extreme ownership & responsibility into your young readers, then pick up this book, The Way of the Warrior Kid, and prepare to for your kids to start taking more ownership in their life.
SELF RELIANCE
Now there is absolutely nothing wrong with depending on others to help you in need. Afterall, that IS what parenting in all about. But, there will come a day when we cannot always be there for our kids and they need to know how to figure things out on their own.
This is the best gift that we can give them: to be confident enough to take charge of themselves and not have to depend on others to fix their problems. If they can rely on themselves, just think of the possibilities that this holds in their life!
Teaching them how to cook, clean, do laundry, fix things, communicate well with others, and problem solve is a treasure that sadly not all kids get taught at an early age. Instead, they are left to figure it out on their own which can lead to various levels of insecurity & stress in adulthood.
Take one step at a time. Day by day. But don’t let this one fall through the cracks.
GRIT
To be able to keep moving forward even after setbacks, is how I define grit. To keep pushing through the hardship because the rewards trump the unpleasantness.
Giving up is easy. trying, and trying, and trying some more isn’t.
I want my kids to learn that even though things might be hard at first, the more that you try, the more that you learn. And when you learn more, you acquire more knowledge, experience, and wisdom.
This character trait isn’t the most fun (on both sides), but it’s worth every step of the way. Having the grit to get what you work for in life will ultimately set them up for success, and that’s what it’s all about, right?
HUMILITY
Being able to recognize that we don’t know it all and there is always more to learn and get better at is one of the most admirable traits that there is.
Nobody likes cocky people. They get a bad rep for a reason and it’s because they lack humility.
Being humble and realizing that we don’t have it all figured out is also one of the best traits in a leader.
Would you rather follow someone who thinks they know best, cannot make mistakes, and bulldozes over their followers? Or would you rather follow someone who is convicted in their beliefs BUT also listens to their followers and shows a humble side that they don’t always know everything?
INTEGRITY
Honesty. Doing what you say and saying what you mean on a consistent basis.
The easiest way to teach this to your kids? SHOW THEM. Allow them to witness what integrity really is by demonstrating it yourself throughout your life.
Kids mimic what they see, and this is one of those character traits that can truly make a difference in their life and the life of those around them.
RESPECT
Everyone is worthy of respect. And when you show others respect, it is often reciprocated.
Respect your kids and they will respect you. It’s a door that swings both ways and it’s something that more kids these days NEED to be taught.
LOVE TO ALL
The world is much different than it used to be. Because of the instant access to other people through social media and the internet, it’s easy to become immersed in adversity. Which makes it even more important now to teach your children to show love to all types of people.
Even if our values, beliefs, and customs might look different, we should be teaching our kids to show love to all people. Love and respect go hand in hand and displaying these acts of kindness will lead a happier and better life.
PATIENCE
This one can seem so impossible to teach, especially in the younger years. It’s even harder when we are immersed in a “give it to me now” culture when everyone wants what they want when the want it (and that is usually now).
Demonstrating patience in your own life and using these as examples for you children will bode them well. If they can learn that time & patience can yield amazing rewards, then it will all be worth the wait.
COURAGE
This isn’t the absence of fear, but experiencing fear and facing it head on. Real courage comes doing things outside our comfort zone that make us stronger and better.
As parents, it’s our responsibility to encourage our kids to face their fears and muster up courage to do hard things that they don’t always want to do.
Because here’s the thing: there will come a day when we aren’t at their side and they will HAVE to either face up to their demons or run away. Running away does nothing for the problem itself and it will also not do anything for their self-esteem.
Think about it. The last time that you ran out on a problem or something that was hard, did that uplift you? Did you make you feel GOOD? I am willing to bet no. Which is why teaching our kids to be courageous can be beneficial for so many reasons.
I am not saying to have them face their fears in an unsafe or scary environment, because that could be equally as damaging. Instead, guide them through the discomfort by their side so that they can learn that they CAN do hard things.
These affirmation cards can be a simple reminder that they CAN do hard things and have full confidence in themselves.
COMPASSION
Being emotionally sensitive and aware of how others feel is the ultimate character trait. It not only helps you develop a humble mind, but it also displays and enforces love, respect, and integrity all wrapped up into one.
If there is one thing to teach your kids from an early age, it’s to be and feel compassionate towards others. Not only will compassion help them feel good, but it will help their neighbor know love and kindness as well.
GRATITUDE
If there is one character trait to teach your kids that will give them ultimate freedom and a chance to truly be happy, it’s gratitude.
The easiest was to teach gratitude is simple: teach your kids to live minimally.
Toys. Vacations. Clothes. Outings. Sports. Basically anything that isn’t an absolute need, giving your kids minimal exposure to it will make them more grateful for it when they do get to experience it.
We might eat out at a restaurant once a year, so when that time rolls around, you can bet my kids are excited and grateful for it. The same goes for vacations and getaways. Life is just heavenly bliss when that day arrives.
If you want your kids to be more grateful for the things that they have, then give them a reason to appreciate it.
SELF DISCIPLINE
You can bark around orders all day long and make your children do chores around the house, but developing true self-discipline comes from within. That’s why it’s called SELF discipline.
The way that I teach this to my kids is by showing them. There are days that I DO NOT want to workout, but I do it anyway. There are times when I just want to set aside my work and put if off for another time, but I power through.
By showing my kids that I push through even when I don’t want to, they experience what self-discipline looks like the and rewards that come with it.
Read Next: Home workout routines that any busy Mom can fit into the day
FORGIVENESS
At the end of the day, nobody is perfect. We all make mistakes. And we can all learn from those mistakes. But, if forgiveness is not taught and formed at an early age, resentment can fester that will ultimately lead to anger.
We can never truly live a happy, healthy, & free life harboring these negatives feelings.
The easiest way to teach forgiveness is by showing forgiveness to others. When my husband & I make mistakes as a married couple, we aim to use it as an opportunity to explain to our kids what forgiveness is and why it’s important. This not only helps our personal relationship with each other others, but it’s helped our family form a tighter bond together.
Read next: Want to have a tight-knit family? Then do these 5 things
When I have a moment of weakness and snap at my kids instead of calmly talking to them, you can bet that I apologize.
Growing up, having an adult apologize to a child was almost unheard of. But, I believe that showing humility to your kids serves you both well as it can deeped your bond with them and also teach them how to display remorse.
Forgiveness easily comes when the guilt is sincere.